In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
