i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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