I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize