can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
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