happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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