Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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