Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize