the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
