you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
