just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
