drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?