Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
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