that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize