im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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