did you get engaged???
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Ketchup is God's man juice
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
