i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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