is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
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