We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
