Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
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