All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
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