Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class http://tfl.nu/1wvn
  Replies (9) Good night (2288) Bad night (559)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category. http://tfl.nu/bs6u
  Replies (55) Good night (804) Bad night (11484)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low. http://tfl.nu/0dri
  Replies (14) Good night (839) Bad night (3746)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Found more tequila

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair (573): Found more tequila http://tfl.nu/cg6k
  Replies (9) Good night (4602) Bad night (526)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control... http://tfl.nu/d926
  Replies (75) Good night (1543) Bad night (4709)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season http://tfl.nu/k0xy
  Replies (55) Good night (5030) Bad night (845)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold. http://tfl.nu/55cb
  Replies (14) Good night (5913) Bad night (868)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants? http://tfl.nu/rdvq
  Replies (9) Good night (2795) Bad night (1048)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face. http://tfl.nu/gh9q
  Replies (9) Good night (1167) Bad night (2341)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon. http://tfl.nu/vfo5
  Replies (7) Good night (880) Bad night (1556)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far http://tfl.nu/hear
  Replies (8) Good night (746) Bad night (1222)
• Favorite

  (786): View more from Florida

  tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (786): tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected. http://tfl.nu/x54o
  Replies (1) Good night (363) Bad night (487)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (260): He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him. http://tfl.nu/2xzg
  Replies (5) Good night (1501) Bad night (629)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer. http://tfl.nu/un9n
  Replies (4) Good night (856) Bad night (259)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina. http://tfl.nu/rytq
  Replies (5) Good night (672) Bad night (271)

Randomize