pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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