I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
