just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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