Define "chronic" masturbator.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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