the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize