Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
