if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
