How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize
