Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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