Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
