4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
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