Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
