This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
