I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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