So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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