You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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