Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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