let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
