Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Randomize
