Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize
