Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
she looked like the before picture.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
