Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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