Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Tell her she can't have a vagina
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
