out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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