my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You need a sexual gate keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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