She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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