It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
The uberlube is also flammable
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
