R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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