If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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